oompa loompas

hello. i possess a burning love and affection for the vertically-challenged man. short men. little men. not oompa loompa little; but those 5'9" and under that inspire snarls and upturned noses from all of my female friends. am i the only woman that likes a pocket-sized fellow?

i'm 5'6" and i haven't dated a guy over 5'8" for seven years. a couple of years ago a friend of mine accused me of preferring short men and i quickly denied it. i wasn't lying, at the time it was just a coincidence that the last couple of men i'd dated could comfortably wear my coats. but since then i do sense a trend, and now i can confidently declare that i like them a little, well, little.

most women believe that a taller man and shorter woman look better as a couple. and, as superficial as this is, it's the only reason for choosing ballers over smallers that i accept and respect. i understand that my girls wanna be able to rock their four inch heels and still have to look up at their men. i struggle in kitten heels, so this is not a problem for me. in fact, my mate can act as the perfect cover for my inability to walk in heels without looking like some kind of injured chicken. but, aside from the aesthetics, my friends' reasoning behind a preference for a man with at least six inches on them is rooted in myth.

they say things like: "i just feel safer with a tall man" or "i need to know he can look after me if we get into trouble". ha! i'm not saying that all the short men i've dated would have fought to protect my honour, but i know that a couple of the tall ones would have most definitely left me to duke it out alone. sure, it would have taken them less strides to run to the payphone and call the ammalance to come get me, but we'd still have needed to have a serious talk on the ride to the hospital.

and my friends say things like: "i don't want to have short sons". ha! i've seen plenty of families where sons tower over their fathers. this is because boys get their height from their mother's side too. the men in my dad's family range from 6' to 6'6", so my babies might could still be long-legged. of course the odds for a tall son are improved if his daddy is tall, but know that you height nazis might still mess around and give birth to your very own gary coleman [sans ashy hands, i hope].

but be clear: i'm not on some kind of moral soapbox. i wouldn't dare mount said box because all of my reasons for liking short men are incredibly shallow. they have nothing to do with the heart of a man, and everything to do with what is good [and convenient] for me.

short men rock because:
1. when we're walking and talking i can turn to give him immediate eye contact.
2. i can snatch kisses from his lips without permission, and without having to go on my tippy toes.
3. when we hug i get to press close to his whole body. [i love those chest-to-chest hugs when my heart can feel his heart beating; AND i can throw in a neck nuzzle!]
4. if tiredness ever strikes unannounced i can always rest my head on his shoulder.

small men are accessible! and accessories! ok, not accessories, but they are accessible. tall men are just so far away. what are you talking about up there? i can barely hear you with your 5'10" head in the sky. meanwhile me and my 5'8" lover are standing in the park, his arms around my waist, mine around his neck, eyes locked, having one of our many moments.

so yes, i like them short. short and scrumptious and lovely and small. if you're 5'7"-5'9" and wouldn't mind going out with a neurotic brit with a mean costume jewellery fetish then feel free to holler at me. not if you're 5'5" though. i mean. that's just sick.


  1. lmao i love this. ive never really been a heightist myself but ive noticed short guys often have a problem with a taller girl. OH WELL. i think men with tall women kinda look like pimps..

    "so how did YOU end up with a supermodel?"


  2. i agree with cecelia! i am 5'11 and don't really care much for height but it's the guys that have hang ups sometimes! My current boyfriend is 6'3 but my ex was barely 6'0 and he always wished he was taller than me when i wore heels

  3. LOL...hmmm, as a 5'9" (and a quarter) fella, I can give a perspective from the male side. Now, for some reason, it seemed taller women where attracted to me, which sort of broke the preconceived notion that taller women 5'8" and up preferred tall men. And I actually enjoyed rolling into a spot with an amazon in my arms. The look on my face, priceless ;)even though it seemed every guy in the club towered over me everytime. On the other side of that, it always seemed the women who where 5'6" and below always wanted the 6'2" and up dudes. Of course this is the root of my disdain for basketball players and any guy that remotely looks like one, lol. I do admit, while I would have preferred to be taller to accommodate the the stiletto wearing hotties, I enjoy my stature now, especially with my proportions (slim) and I cringe everytime a woman makes a point to acknowledge and swoon over the bama, non-dressing and corny guy who happens to be 6'5". Those women usually didn't have a clue anyway, lol.

    Now I have been hearing more women say they would rather a man who is of similar height for the exact reasons you mentioned. My S.O. is 5'3"...5'10 in those heels and it doesn't bother me a bit.

    I commend you for showing us shorter, but fly guys some love!! Now go get you a little person and to hug up on, lol.


  4. Sorry to go off dubject, but your hair style is sending pangs through me, I want my shaved head back when I see a girl rocking shaved in designs. I was fond of stars, butterflies and wispy lines, respect for doing it so well. Is it not the lushest feeling to get out of bed, and your hair is done? Good times...

  5. im 5 ft 11.. wont date anyone shorter cos 5 days out of anybodys week im in 4 inch heels.... but i give credit to chicks who can...

  6. love the blog btw.. check mine out http:fashionisprotein.blogspot.com

  7. 1. This post is very true
    2. Your hair is dope
    'Tis all lol

  8. you gave some valid pointers but i am sorry - i just cannot. lol. i would have to agree with some of your girls on this one. i am 5'8. i have to be able to throw on four to fives and still be able to look up or make leveled eye to eye with my sweetie. it just feels good.

    btw, you are beautiful! love your cut.




  10. lol! you put up a good case for the small fellas...bless ya - someone's gotta look out for them :)

  11. yo i love em short as well. i'm 5'4 been with tall and shorter men...but i prefer them around my height...:)

  12. Wow... OK. I've considered men who were my height (that undesirable 5'5" dude you spoke of) and up to 6'5". No preference. Goodies come with varied heights. As long as he feels comfortable, I'm comfortable where the heels are concerned.